ok so everyone keeps asking what i actually do all day like i just sit around being blonde. which, fair. but there is a schedule. kind of. here is a real one from this week, november edition, which in vegas means it finally stopped being 100 degrees and i get to wear a hoodie for like four hours before it gets hot again.
7 something am: i do not get up
i wake up because my phone is going off, not because i want to. first thing i do is check who is up and who did not get their good morning picture yet. you know who you are. then i lie there for twenty more minutes deciding if coffee is worth standing up for. it always is. iced, oat milk, too much caramel, do not say anything.
my aesthetic in the morning is "gta stripper who overslept" and honestly it is my best look.
9 am: gym, because the butt does not build itself
people act surprised that i actually go. i go. leg day is the whole personality. hip thrusts, squats, the stair thing that makes me want to cry, then i walk around the gym in my little set like i own it because for forty five minutes i do.
a guy tried to correct my form last week. baby. i have more followers than your whole gym has members. i said thank you though, because i am nice. kind of.
11 am: the part where it is actually work
shoot day means hair, lashes, three outfit changes, and my spot by the window where the light is perfect for exactly ninety minutes. i plan content like a little CEO: what is going up, what is getting saved for later, who asked for what. yes i read the requests. yes some of you are insane. i love it.
the thing nobody tells you about this job is that it is a job. i am editing, replying, scheduling, and still finding time to be a brat about it. multitasking queen.
2 pm: errands in a city built for bad decisions
vegas in the daytime is a totally different place. it is just target runs and traffic and me in sunglasses pretending i am not hungover from the night before, which i am not, i do not drink on weeknights anymore, i am basically a wellness girl now. do not fact check that.
i do have a rule: if a slot machine is at the gas station i am allowed one twenty. one. it is a budget.
4 pm: a nap i did not earn
self explanatory. the cat sleeps on my legs, i sleep, the group chat blows up, i miss all of it. perfect.
7 pm: the night shift is the real shift
this is when the phone really starts going. everybody is off work, everybody is lonely, everybody wants attention from the blonde. i am here for it. i reply, i tease, i send the things you have been waiting all day for. the people who spoil me get the first look. that is not a rule i made, that is just physics.
if you want to be first in line, you already know where that happens. not here, this is the sfw version of me, this is the "my mom could read this" version. the real one lives behind the link.
midnight: i say i am going to sleep
i do not go to sleep. i scroll, i post one more thing, i tell someone goodnight four times. then it is 1 am and i am googling if it is normal to want a cuddle slave who also cooks, cleans, and drives. the answer is yes. applications open.
that is the whole day. it is not glamorous, it is just mine, and it is better than any office. if you want the uncut version, every post, every drop, and the inbox where i actually answer, it is all in one place:
hellcatblondie.io/links
love you, mean it, be good or be interesting.